Loving the Hell out of Myself – Part 9

January 17, 2018

In what ways do you want to change in order to be the change you want to see in the world?

You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.

– C.S. Lewis

(New to this series? Start here.)

This is it. The ninth of nine blog installments on the process of loving the hell out of myself to become unfcukwithable[1].  I’m not a numerologist, and I know next to nothing about the study of numbers. But for whatever reason, I felt compelled to find out what a numbers guru would have to say about the number 9.

Here’s an excerpt from the first hit my Google search produced:

Number 9 is the number of universal love…spiritual awakening, service to humanity… leading by positive example… inner-strength… learning to say ‘No’… inner-wisdom, self-love, freedom… altruism and benevolence, empathy, compassion, non-conformity… an expansive viewpoint… eccentricity, communication… forgiveness, compassion…” (

I smiled as I read. Number 9 obviously pertains to unfcukwithable people. The descriptors play nicely into the narrative I want to share in this “wrap-up” installment: becoming unfcukwithable empowers us to be the change we want to see in the world.

As I’ve spoken of in my preceding blog installments, when we love the hell out of ourselves (purge our self-sabotaging beliefs, thoughts and behaviours), we create space within us for authenticity, attitude-shift and awareness. By doing so, we regain the freedom that’s inherent in living authentically. With awareness and a reframing attitude, we convert stressful, debilitating circumstances into energizing, enabling opportunities.

These outcomes in and of themselves are hugely valuable. But to my mind, the ultimate reward of becoming unfcukwithable is the ability to increasingly manifest love, peace and joy, each in our own way, in a world somewhat lacking in these. As within, so without, goes the saying. Whatever we have inside of us is what we’re able to give to the outside world.

When we are truly at peace and in touch with ourselves, and nothing anyone says or does bothers us, and no negativity or drama can touch us, we’re able to focus our undistracted attention and undiluted energy to the job at hand: living our life purpose to the fullest. Or, to say it other ways, creating the best version of ourselves and gifting it to all those we encounter; or, making a positive difference, in our own unique way, within our sphere of influence, no matter how small or large.

However it’s said, one of the most amazing aspects of the “becoming” process is that it doesn’t matter what stage of our life we begin it. For me, it was at the age of 60, following several years of me becoming sufficiently comfortable in my own skin (developing self-worth, self-esteem, self-confidence—all the selfies of self-love) that I finally silenced my inner naysayers and embraced my dream of ending my corporate career to pursue my passion of writing, speaking and educating.

As George Eliot put it, “It’s never too late to be what you might have been”. Whether we’re 17 or 71, if we want the rest of our life to be the best of life, this very moment is the perfect time to start loving the hell out of ourselves.

We can’t un-write or change whatever chapters of our life story we have already lived. But, regardless of what has been written to date, we can empower ourselves to write our yet-to-be-lived chapters in a way that will cause our hearts to sing—and, in so doing, bring our music into the world.

You’ve completed this leg of the journey of becoming unfcukwithable. I invite you to walk it as many times as your spirit entices you. I’m quite certain you’ll notice something new about yourself each time you make the trek. As you become increasingly unfcukwithable, how are you paying forward the peace that’s growing inside of you?

Unfcukwithably yours,


[1] Unfcukwithable: (adj.) when you’re truly at peace and in touch with yourself, and nothing anyone says or does bothers you, and no negativity or drama can touch you. (Urban Dictionary)

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